The daddies are coming for a visit next week. I haven’t seen them since before the transfer. I can’t believe it’s been that long. We skype and facetime regularly, so it doesn’t feel like that long, but it’ll be so nice to have them here and get the opportunity to really share this pregnancy with them. You can only convey so much through pictures, even pictures as cute as these.
They fly in on Wednesday, and we have some big plans. Wednesday night, they are taking me and Mike out to La Fondue (ooh la la). Then Thursday morning, they are treating me to a pedicure before the main event, the anatomy ultrasound and the big gender reveal.
(Although we kind of accidentally found out that Baby B is a boy. At my last doctors appointment, my OB was doing a routine scan just to check their heartbeats, when Baby B suddenly flipped over and presented us with his bottom and his very obvious boy bits. Both the doctor and I gasped in unison, causing the daddies, who were facetiming with us, to say “What, what?!” “Well,” said the doctor, “I could tell you Baby B’s gender, if you want…” The daddies said sure, so we shared the news. She tried to get a look at Baby A, too, but to no avail. Baby A stayed resolutely in a tight little ball. But I digress…)
After the ultrasound, we’ll grab lunch before I have to go to work, where I will stay late for an event (boo) while the daddies take Ramona and Solomon to Toys R Us for some good, old fashioned spoiling. The next day, Tomer is insisting on cooking Shabbat dinner for the family, which is exciting not only because I’ve been dying for him to cook for me but also because it will be amusing to watch him arm wrestle my mom for control over the kitchen. Tee hee.
It will be a whirlwind few days, and I’m sure it will be over too soon. But I’m going to do my best to savor the time we have together, especially because this will be their only visit before the birth.
After the daddies fly home Saturday morning, I will be heading to Congregation Beth David. They asked me to come speak about my journey so far at a learning session after services–they even made a flyer! One of the rabbis will teach about Jewish halacha (law) regarding surrogacy and then I’ll add a personal touch by telling my story. Here’s an interesting tidbit: Judaism is a matrilineal religion; people born of a Jewish mother are themselves considered Jewish. I always thought that meant that if an egg donor is used, she needed to be Jewish for the child to be born Jewish. I recently learned that it is not the egg that matters but the womb. A Jewish womb is like a mikveh, and any child born of that womb is Jewish. (“Jewish law does not recognize the microbial,” a rabbi said to me today, “only things that can be seen with the naked eye.” Interesting…) I thought that my being Jewish was just an emotional plus, but now that I know it is actually halachically imperative that I am Jewish, this entire endeavor is imbued with even more meaning. I am looking forward to learning more next Saturday. Now I just need to figure out what I’m going to say… I kinda hate public speaking.